By RODNEY HO/ firstname.lastname@example.org, originally filed Sunday, March 13, 2016
My wife and I are taking a long weekend in the North Georgia mountains and the home I’m staying at does not get Bravo. I thought I could get around it by using my smartphone to watch it on Xfinity on demand. It worked through the first commercial break and then stopped.
It took me a half hour to get it back. So I basically watched half the episode. I used Twitter to fill in the blanks. And based on all that, the reality is not much happened. That makes it pretty easy for me to write a recap, right?
As my friend Michelle Brown at Straight from the A tweeted:
This was the 17th episode, the shortest season RHOA has had since season three. New “friend” Shamea Morton – like Demetria McKinney a season earlier – was practically a no show. Sheree Whitfield and NeNe Leakes returned to give the season a modest spark. Cynthia Bailey had her moments, as did Porsha Williams, who relished her return to full-time household status and even kicked Cynthia in the gut at one point for kicks.
Kenya Moore seemed happier with her new boo and acted properly jealous toward newbie Kim Fields, not the most exciting new entry on the show but the potential is there. The focal point of Kandi Burruss and her baby, which actually came after the show finished taping. I am surprised they ended with the Christmas party instead of Kandi’s birth. But they like to have the season finale with all the ladies there so they can provide proper “updates.” (Bravo “teased” that Kenya might be preggers. We’ll see.)
The ghost of Apollo Nido hung heavy over this season, even as Phaedra Parks tried to move on, filing for divorce and having the kids visit him. We don’t see him except in flashback since prisons don’t allow cameras in.
Apollo owes the federal government $2 million after ripping off a raft of people using a host of white-collar schemes. He landed in prison in 2014 for eight years and has been in now for 18 months. The Feds apparently tried last year to seize some of his assets at the homes of Cynthia Bailey and Kandi Burruss. (Their hubbies were friends with Apollo.)
This was the most controversial aspect of the episode.
All the housewives think Phaedra tipped off the Feds. (Then again, didn’t they talk about Todd keeping Apollo’s stuff on the show last season?)
Phaedra hosted a Christmas party, organized by Dwight Eubanks, who hasn’t really been on the show for ages. He was Sheree’s token gay buddy in the early seasons but organized many of Phaedra’s parties.
During the party, Phaedra acted dumb when told about the seizures. “Wow, that’s crazy,” she said. “I heard about it. You can’t always believe what you here.” Then she excused herself.
Other bits and pieces from the hour:
- Sheree appears to have reconciled with her ex Bob. Maybe. He acted dumb when confronted about saying he slept with Tammy. “I got brain trauma,” Bob offered. And he was sweating like it was 200 degrees in there. Sheree: “What’s wrong boo boo? Slut got your tongue?”
- Kenya dressed up as the Grinch for the Christmas party. [Insert joke here]
- Kenya claims her Moore Manor is almost finished. Maybe it’ll get done before Chateau Sheree. Matt also gets her two new dogs to replace Velvet.
- Kenya thinks Phaedra pretends to forgive people but doesn’t really forgive them.
- NeNe and Kandi kiss and make up after some rocky times in the past. “I am in a better place,’ NeNe said.
- Kim solidified her friendship with Phaedra.
- At the party, Phaedra did a choreographed dance with Kim’s not-gay hubby Chris Morgan.
- Miss Juicy of Rickey Smiley/”Little Women Atlanta” fame showed up to the party as an elf. Anything for a paycheck, eh?
- To prove Cynthia and Peter’s relationship is in a better place. She tries to undress him in front of the camera.
- Porsha has fibroids, which is very common among women. (My wife had them, too.)
- Phaedra in the end never paid Todd in full for that video even after saying she would. He’s over it. And… so are we.